Happy Independence Day to all Malaysians!! Hope you are enjoying the public holiday with your amazing fellow Malaysians. I know I am. TODAY, all Malaysians celebrate the day Tunku Abdul Rahman, Malaysia's first prime minister declared "Merdeka" (Freedom) for the country in 1957. The day Malaysia finally broke free from colonial rule. The day the hardships of our ancestors finally make sense.

Nothing can describe freedom. Freedom is everything to me. Its the smell of success, fulfillment, victory yet it reminds me of hardship, pain and sweat. I have taken the time to celebrate my freedom from fat, from weight issues, from food, from myself. For this, I am thankful to God. Today, I confessed I love reading what you shared in your posts and I sincerely wish that one day all of you here will be celebrating your own Independence Day. You will be the person you ought to be. No longer you need to hear the word obesity, fat or overweight. You will finally be FREE!!! MERDEKA!

District 9... Is one Awesome and disturbing yet inspirational movie!
I've just watch District 9 and to those of you who have not, Go watch it.

In short, District 9 features a gazillion of aliens which mothership stranded right over Johannesburg, South Africa. We humans decide to take in the stranded visitors by providing them food and shelter. Hence, the MNU (Multi-National United) is created to oversee the welfare of the aliens.

In my opinion, the film is so confrontational and depressing to watch. There are many lessons to be learned here. What District 9 got to offer is something more than ordinary. There are over 2,000,000 aliens in the camp. And when faced with desperate relocation of illegal refugees (the aliens), with scarce resources and almost no humanitarian aid, human beings resort to brutal measures. The black Africans who suffered under their leader, Apartheid dominates Johannesburg, telling news crews "It would be different if they were just from another country. What rights do we grant to non-human life forms?" These gangs have exploited the aliens, trading them cat food (somehow the aliens loves them) for their valuable weapons and ruling the village with cruel violence. We are given a very peculiar picture of human intolerance and greed.

All these issues came into my mind when I watch District 9. It will be hard to not compare District 9 with what is happening in the real world. We humans can be very selfish and prejudice towards something or someone whom are indifferent to the main population. When applied towards the fat people, it is very disappointing. Just because we are fat, does not mean it gives others the right to treat us unrighteous and disrespectful. We today are so blinded by materialism and appearance that we may without knowing outcast others whom are unlike us. Like the aliens in District 9, these outcast people do the best they can to survive in today's society while longing to be accepted.

Then we have the hero, Wikus van something something. Sorry. I can't really remember. He started as a normal average guy working for the MNU but is forced to become violent to survive. Wikus reminded me of my former self. A guy who refuses to accept what’s happening to him. He thinks he’s just having a terrible nightmare. He didn’t want to be a lab rat for the MNU and he didn’t want to be part of the aliens’ escape plan. All Wikus wants to do is return to his normal self. Though he took sometime, but eventually he did accept the person he has become and stood up bravely for his alien friend. This is a lesson we should all learn. The earlier we accept that we are different and that we have chosen the path to change, the easier the journey would be for us. There is no point running away from the fact. Accept that we need to achieve a certain goal and do it! Stop running away from it!

So to those of you who haven watch District 9, go watch it. Whether you love it or hate it I think we all agree we need some "moral enlightment".

In light of what happen with regards to ACCA, I was definitively frustrated and stressed. In which this reminds me on my first hand experience on stress eating. Stress eating.. Yes? Familiar? This is one of the most favorite discussion today. I also read about Lori Ann's stress eating issues. Stress eating or what I would like to call DESTRUCTIVE eating because it does nothing good to our body but destroys it along with our dreams actually has no permanent solution. But we can control it. Just look at the photo. See what DESTRUCTIVE eating has done to Jessica Simpson.

Every time I had an argument with my father or whenever i feel tense or wound up, I would want to eat something because it changes my state. At least that's what I think. Every time I wait too long for something or someone I would feel agitated and I would feel better after chewing down something. Especially Chips!! When I was working, I use to reach into my desk drawer for a candy bar or snack after a tense meeting or an uncomfortable run-in with my co-worker. If you are facing something similar like me, YOU ARE A DESTRUCTIVE EATER!!

Try doing this quiz I found on the internet - http://www.stresseaterquiz.com

We must first start by identifying the situation and acknowledging to ourselves that we are, indeed, turning to food during times of stress and uncertainty.

In order to confront our stress eating, we need to be able to identify what causes it and also come up with other ways to deal with stress. Spend some time trying to figure that out and then substitute it.

Some articles I read stated that exercise and movement are always a good way to deal with stress and tension. Well, it doesn't work for me though. Because every time I hit the gym, I need to stay focus on my daily goal. I have to mentally fit in order to workout and it doesn't work the other way around for me. However, it may be possible to take a quick walk around the block or up a few flights of stairs to clear my head.

I would encourage listening to music or writing out feelings of frustration in a journal or even here in your blog like what you have been doing can be a productive way to let go of stress instead of turning to the refrigerator. If you love talking and it helps to talk to a friend, then making a phone call can be a stress reliever. I always call my gym partner when I'm unhappy. By doing that, the person on the other end can tell if I am are eating while talking. So back to my earlier posts, choose a friend that is also working toward healthier eating habits, then you can be a support-system for each other. If your feeling agitated at night, try taking a bath. You'll be surprise. It works wonders.

Oh! And I read from some of the others blogs that they usually get stressed up too much with their chores. My advice, stop worrying so much about cleaning the house, doing the laundry, washing the dishes and running around from left to right. Take time for yourself. Think of this as MUMMY'S STRESS BREAK! If you take care of yourself first, you will be a much better person.

And last but not least, chew a piece of gum during the time of the day when you typically eat because of stress. Works all the time for me!

To sum it up:
1)Identify and substitute
2)Express it, instead of eating it
3)Bath, Bath, Bath
4)Mummy's Stress Break!
5)Start Chewing GUM!

I am seriously damn piss off right now. I couldn't work out. I feel immobilize, tire and I couldn't even run for 10 minutes without having this trouble lingering around my head. My head feels so much heavier than a 25lbs dumbbell. I picked up the weights only to put it back right down. I only did 2 sets of biceps curl and I decided to call it off. I thought everything would be find. And that I would give up my job and concentrate on finishing up my ACCA examinations. But I was wrong.

ACCA is suppose to be one of the oldest accounting body and claims to be the best of the best for professional accountants. They even proudly tell the world Why ACCA? If ACCA is so much world class, then i wonder what about the people working there. Let me summarize them for you. S**T!

As far as I'm concerned, they have the worst customer service. Two months ago, I called up ACCA Malaysia to make an inquiry. The female on the end of the phone was totally rude. All I wanted to know was why I tried calling so many times but I couldn't get through and she said with so much sarcasm in her voice - "We have to eat do you know that?". Not even a word of apology. Great!

Nevertheless, I took the liberty to go straight to their office somewhere in Dang Wangi. I took the LRT (is like a subway) to avoid any unnecessary jam. I had a hard time searching for Wisma Denmark and ended up asking a passerby. Not only they didn't have a proper signboard on their building, it was quite well hidden. The female at the counter was very very very unhelpful. She just gave me a few brochures and ask me to read them but all I wanted was someone to verify my exemptions. I even printed out their exemption inquiry form from their website and took the time to fill it up. And as she reluctantly flip through my qualifications, she grimly look at me and say - "Oh. You don't need this form as your a Monash graduate. You are given 9 papers exemptions as stated on the website. All we need is your Academic Transcript". I was wondering why the female on the phone couldn't have told me this earlier. Then there is no need for me to come second time.

But that was just small matters. Till this morning when I receive their so called "WELCOME PACKAGE", only to realize I was given only 7 papers exemptions. I was fuming with anger. I had enrolled myself with a university and paid the school fees in full. I can't take the exam for my current paper till I complete the other 2 papers which I was suppose to be exempted from. What am I to do now? I do not understand. Why couldn't they inform me earlier? Classes for ACCA started in July and they are only telling me now!! I am seriously pissed of! And they never gave me any reason. Why is this? I was assured by Monash University that everything would be find and I'll be given the appropriate exemptions. I do not know what to do now? I am seriously stressed up.

I wonder is there anyone out there facing the same problem.

I never started, thinking I will ever reach this far. Similar to most people, I started my weight loss mission by not allowing myself to eat fast food, cutting down my carbs intake by half and it made life at that moment seem meaningless. Today,I confessed if it wasn't for the support of this few individuals, I wouldn't had made it. I receive a photograph from a dear friend, Leon today (refer on the left). It was a taken back in 2008 in our university gym. On the left is Leon and I'm the guy on the right. I was still in the midst of losing weights. Looking back at the photograph reminds me how my journey began. Inspired by that photograph Leon send to me, I'm dedicating this entry to 5 people who have made a difference in my life when I was down,when I was still struggling in my weight loss journey and during those times I needed a push from the back.

1.My Good Friend Leon – Leon is probably the closest friend I have in my life right now which amazes me everyday. Not only because he is one of the most smartest person I know in college but mostly because at first glance we are an unlikely match. When I first met him back in college, Leon was the personification of "KIASU". I on the other hand am a person who can care less. Yet we are like "SIONG DI" (blood brothers) on the INSIDE. We have the same values,morals and thinking. I know he will ALWAYS tell me the truth even if it hurts and that is a GREAT thing that money cant buy. We ALL need more honesty in our lives.
It was Leon who asked me to accompany to the university gym, and, stupidly, I actually said yes. At that time, I am usually very quite. Maybe its due to the fact that I was stuck in a FAT PIG body. But Leon was very motivating. We understood each other. I figured if Leon was at the gym, I wouldn't be so ashamed with myself. If it wasn't for him, this journey would never had begin.

2. My GF Christina - Who reminds me so much of who I really am. She didn't mind when I was a BIG MONSTER. She is way too nice and cares sometimes more than she should. Without any doubt she is so much a part of me now that I don’t know what I would do if she was not there. She is a fighter even if she does not know it, and she was always there throughout my whole transformation journey! She help cooked for me according to my diet and supported me when i was on the verge of giving up. Thank you for sticking up with me till today.

3. My friend Say – Say is my dearest friend and my gym partner. Unlike me, Say was a normal person. He is not fat. Nevertheless, he has always supported me in gym. He inspires me everyday to push the extra mile. Say is one of the smartest people I know and he is also one of the funniest. He taught me always to push those last reps, no matter WHAT!!

4.My brother Steven – I always say my brother Steven is one of the most talented writers in the world as far as I am concerned even if he does not think so. He recently won first price in an essay competition and his face was all over the News Straits Times. But more than that he is one of the most caring people I know.
He inspires me EVERYDAY to be a better person. He was also fat and in the last few years he worked hard and he inspires me everyday to lose weight and become a better person.

5. My Mother Patricia – My mother was likely the ULTIMATE mom and I don’t say that just because she's my Mom. My mother is a STRONG woman and had an unbelievable capacity to LOVE. She goes all out for anyone she love especially for her kids. I am very proud to be her son and I will be there for her till the day I leave this place.

So, when you're trying to lose weight, you've got to face many challenges . Temptation will always be there to bring you down. One place you can always go, your close family and friends. Let them know that you need their help and encouragement, and most of all, someone to be accountable to.

If you don't have a family and friends, is ok. Just start finding a diet buddy. Groups like Weight Watchers or fat loss groups on Facebook contains other people who want to lose weight. When you are among a group with similar interest, you're sure to find them a source of motivation.The best part it could be the start of a beautiful friendship!

Well, today, I'm going to make my very first confession in this blog. Have you ever experience eating a delicious meal with your friend at a favorite dining place, and as you get up from the table, you find your belly popping out like a big air balloon. You then, only realize you have overeaten and feeling slightly guilty.

I confessed, that was what used to happen to me and it just happened again today. I met up with an old classmate and we had lunch at Black Canyon Coffee. I ordered beef spaghetti. It taste all right. But not worth for the amount you are paying. We catch up, reminiscing the good old days in high school. Not trying to show off, but I kind of like being compliment by him for my new found body. An hour later, we ordered tuna sandwiches and a bowl of salad. And before I realized it, I was already burping.

In the past, I used to be dreading the whole day, blaming myself for being so weak and useless. When I recall now,I used to sabotage myself with words like: “I am such a loser”, “I am freaking hopeless", "I will never be thin" and many other negative statements. If you find yourself doing the same thing, STOP IT right now! You gain nothing for blaming yourself.

So what should you do the next time you overeat?

This is what I usually do. Every time a negative situation occur, I will come up with a way in which that could be perceived as a positive. For example, in this case, I overate with my friend, I might respond "at least now I can tell you how's the food there"

The purpose here is not to convince yourself to be happy about something you're not. but rather to recognize and increase your capacity to find the positive in the midst of a challenge. Now, try practicing this...

1. Think of something you are not happy about in your weight loss journey.
2. Now come up with as many ways it could be perceived as a good thing.

Remember, to achieve a positive weight loss, start embracing the positive !

I always realise people do not suddenly want to transform their body for no reason. Often, the reason is not for such a noble cause. I had casually ask many whom i met at the gym - Why go through all this pain? Many came up with this answer - to look good naked and to attract the opposite sex... or in special cases - the same sex.

Don't laugh. brows.gif You know is true.

Nonetheless, is "looking good naked" or "attracting hot babes" a solid enough reason to drag your butt to the gym and put yourself through intense, grueling workouts day in and day out?

Is it a good enough reason to make sacrifices, give up bad habits by totally changing your dietary habits and start eating healthy, body building food spread consistently throughout the day?

Is it a compelling enough reason to get up after you have failed the first time, second and countless more times to retry again that are required to make a transformation of this magnitude?

Maybe it will be and maybe it won't be. To some it can be very motivating. Think about it. Is there anything wrong by wanting to attract the opposite sex. Come on, I mean who doesn't want to look good naked? Furthermore, who doesn't want to attract the attention of the women or men we find appealing? Most of us do.

To be honest, that's one of the reasons I started shredding all those excessive fats and it's still is. It is a normal, valid reason and it does motivate me, but it is not by any means my only reason. And if you want to be successful in this, it shouldn't be your only reason either. You need a reason so big and powerful that it will propel you towards success. And once you got that reason, constantly remember it and you will have the force so powerful that no one can stop you from achieving your dreams but yourself.

The number one secret to transform your body and thus your life is to have a burning desire to do so and in order to fuel this burning desire you have to have a strong enough reason, or list of reasons, as to why you are putting forth the effort to make this transformation. So today before you start your workout, ask yourself - WHY?

Today, it begins - the first day of what will probably be an entirely new relationship with food an entirely new relationship with your body. One of the most remarkable things about making a true commitment to transforming your weak, fat, flabby framed body into the strong, ripped, muscular version of your ideal self is the impact that this journey will have on your entire life. Everything that we do, say, or think in this world acts incorelation from the rest of our life situation like a ripple effect that moves outward into other areas of our life.

For example if you begin by making simple changes to your diet in an effort to eat healthier, more nutritious and muscle-building foods, this change will also effect: the way you feel (i.e. your emotional state), your daily energy levels (i.e. your vitality), your interaction with others (i.e. your relationships), your ability to work, focus, and get things done (i.e. your career) and so on.

Beyond that, people will take notice and see the improvement that this effect is having on your life, which could lead them to make more conscious dietary decisions themselves. In other words, you've become a positive example to others merely by making the decision to transform your body, and this decision is having an impact not only on your own life but in the lives of others.

When you make the commitment to transform your body, you are, in effect, taking a journey to radically transform every aspect of your life.

You can reach me at: keevenlim@gmail.com

Feel free to contact me, if you need anything at all. Your personal details will remain confidential. You can reach me by filling up the form below. Alternatively you may leave comments on my blog and I’ll respond as soon as I can. Thank you.

Why I Started the Confessions from an Ex Fat Boy?

Well, the biggest reason is just that I always wanted to make a web site dedicated to weight loss. I want to share my experience as an Ex Fat Boy, how I face it, and the solutions to it. Ever since I was a small child, I was roundish and clumsy in whatever aspect. I've been fat my whole life. My mother took care of me from birth while my dad worked and, as I was the first born child in the family, she love me so much that she also fed me wayyy too much and lots of pasta, rice, soups, potatoes and gravy, fat, sugar and salt. As I got older, I started enjoying food more and more.

I was only 13 when I recall being tormented for being overweight. I was around 150 pounds!!! It’s actually very sad as a lot of my childhood is blocked out of my own memory. I'm left with little images of individual events - your general name calling and getting mildly pushed around. I remember my nickname was "pork chop". I was being called that by the elder boys who thought they were so funny. No one ever stuck up for me. I remember dreading recesses and spending it alone in some random corner where I hoped to be left alone. No one made eye contact with me and people really weren’t all that nice.The last time I remember I was only 17 years old, 5’6” but weigh 210 pounds on the dot!

And so I told myself enough is enough. I had a dream. I wanted to look slim and ripped. I wanted to wear a size M T-shirt without having my excess belly fat sticking out. I want to be a ladies-magnet when I walked down the streets for at least once in my life. Through out the year, I've spent a ton of time seeking out all kinds of diet and workout information through magazines, web sites and forums, and the amount of useless, unnecessary, and just plain wrong information out there is just crazy. As if that wasn't bad enough, the amount of people trying to sell this information or sell some type of book, supplement, pill, machine, membership or product of some kind is even crazier.Don't get me wrong, there is indeed some great free useful and truthful information out there. I just wanted to help add to it.

Regarding Confessions from an Ex Fat Boy itself, essentially all I really want is to provide the tools and information that had helped me to lose weight. I will show you EXACTLY how I did that, so that YOU TOO CAN DO THE SAME THING. So that my dream can be YOUR DREAM too.

Regards,

Keeven Lim
Ex Fat Boy